doomsday
by fressamour
Summary: "The day you finally let yourself love Maura the way you both deserve isn't going to be your freaking doomsday. It's your destiny."
1. Chapter 1

Jane, sitting on the stool Maura provided, fidgets and whines like a seven year old being kept a moment too long from the playground.

Maura, crouching down, looks up and sighs motherly — a mix between obtaining patience from deep within her and losing it simultaneously — like Angela used to.

"If you'd stop moving, this would be over a lot quicker." Maura reminds, using her gloved hands to stable Jane's knee. "Please," she tries through her clenched teeth, annoyed.

Jane rolls her eyes. "Well I'm sorry you don't know what you're doing." She waits a beat for Maura to protest but then continues. "I mean you work on the dead, Maur. I know I got pretty banged up but I didn't think it was that bad."

Maura works her jaw, trying to just ignore Jane's tactics of provoking her which are so close to actually working. She just applies the rest of the ibuprofen gel on the her best friend's freshly cleaned knee wound.

"Are you giving me the silent treatment now?" Jane asks, kicking her knee.

It almost knocks into Maura's face. She grabs it firmly and presses the leg against the desk.

"Fine," the injured woman smirks. "But just so you know; you're not invited to beer with us after now."

The Medical Examiner applies the band-aid then stands, snapping her gloves off. Jane winces at the sound but pretends she didn't. "I can't go, anyway." Maura turns to push the tray holding her supplies away.

Jane looks visibly deflated. "What? Why?" her arms drop and her brow is pulled together in confusion.

Maura shrugs, "I have a date."

"A date?" her voice is flat and unapproving.

Maura is oblivious. "Yes, a date." She assures in an obvious way. Like she doesn't believe Jane doesn't know what a date is.

"What kind of date?"

"Well, I'm not sure."

"You're not sure?" again, Jane's voice is flat. She stalks up behind her best friend but keeps a two foot distance between them. "What kind of date is it? Business or pleasure?"

Maura chuckles, almost innocently, because she actually thinks Jane is joking. With her back to her best friend, she doesn't see that Jane is actually really intrigued and pissed off and visibly fuming at the idea.

"I don't think there are very many business dates at night, Jane." She turns. She stops suddenly when she sees Jane is closer than she thought and her friend is quite obviously unimpressed with the news. "I didn't think I was invited to drinks anyway, Jane. We lost the game."

"All those other lab geeks aren't invited," Jane waves dismissively. "You always are."

Maura looks touched. "Thank you,"

"So you're coming?"

She frowns. "I can't. I have a date." She repeats, this time more firmly to imply that she's actually looking forward to it.

"So, what? Call him and reschedule for next Friday when I have work Beat with the newbies."

"You have to work Beat?"

"Cavanaugh thinks it'll inspire the newbies to be better," she shrugs off the conversation like she doesn't care. "C'mon Maur, I can buy you a consolation drink. You guys really tried this time."

Maura looks confused. "This is only our third loss."

Jane sighs. "I'm aware of the freaking score, Maur. I just think you need a drink. You're not used to losing."

She smiles. "You're not used to losing. I accept defeat very well. I learn from it." She's taking off her jersey now.

The prominent red letters spelling out "BPD Forensics" float into Jane's sight and she has a moment of resentment for Maura's natural talent at baseball. But then again, she isn't surprised because Maura's a natural at everything. Especially if she applies science to it.

"So you're not coming?" she asks, the question really being "you'd rather go on a date with a stiff than have a drink with me?"

Maura picks up on it and turns to face Jane. She looks at her friend softly and tries to sound as apologetic as she can manage but she has to be firm with Jane for her friend to understand. "I spend nearly every night with you, Jane. At The Robber, your apartment, my home, or even in the Homicide bullpen upstairs."

"Hey, it's fine." Jane backs away from Maura, her hands up and palms out. "I get it. You wanna get laid, that's cool. I'd be doing the same if someone finally showed interest in me too." She means for it to hurt and ignores the urge to immediately apologize when Maura's face falls into something resembling hurt.

"I suppose." The honey-blonde musters, quietly. "So we're at an understanding?"

"Yup." The brunette swallows. "Clear as a freaking crystal-ball." She grabs her mitt and ball on her way out.

Maura watches as she leaves with a crestfallen look but doesn't follow after Jane. She wants to. Desperately, she does but she needs some time away from her best friend. It's only healthy that they have their space. Jane would understand if it were her that studied human behavior.

* * *

Jane's apartment is invitingly warm but repugnantly cluttered. Frankie, Frost, and Korsak all sit on her couch with a beer in their hands and their feet rested on her coffee table.

She looks at them all with disgust before walking through and knocking their feet to the floor. "This isn't the Robber and this isn't your own place." Jo Friday follows her.

"Don't mind her," Frankie puts his feet back up despite his sister's warning glare. "She's just mad because her girlfriend didn't want to come."

Frost snorts. "You and the Doc are fighting again?" only he says it like it's a regular occurrence and he's not even surprised that they're right on schedule.

Which it has been for the last three weeks. No one, not even Jane and Maura, know why.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

Korsak intervenes before Frost accidently digs himself in a hole and finds his ass working back in Robbery before he can finish his beer. "Oh nothing, Rizzoli. You girls just have high estrogen levels, that's all the kid is saying."

Not only Jane, but Frankie and Frost look at him with an appalled look. "Girls?" Frost mouths to Frankie?

"Estrogen?" Frankie mouths back with disgust.

They shudder.

"Excuse you?" Jane pushes the foot rest on her recliner down. "We are not girls, we're fuckin' women Vince. Alright? And fuck you, my estrogen levels are fine."

"Coulda' fooled me." He shrugs nonchalantly, apparently not realizing that he's being sexist.

Jane wants to say more but Vince is just an old asshole who wouldn't know a thing about women even if he had a set of tits himself. Jane eyes him over her beer as she downs it and notices his chest is a little flabby.

She sighs frustratingly and turns the volume on the game up.

* * *

Maura's date is a tall man with jet black hair that stands stylishly on his head at an inch in height. He's muscular and wears an expensively gray fitted suit. His bluchers correspond with the color of his hair.

He sits across from her at a restaurant she's been herself dying to try out. She's never had anyone but Jane to take with her but her best friend refuses to be caught dead in a place she knows everyone will assume she can't afford.

So Maura eats at three-star restaurants for the benefit of her friend.

Up until tonight, she thought she didn't mind only ever doing what Jane wants to do but as she talks to the most fascinating man she's met in a long time, she finds that her separation from Jane was long overdue.

"So," he grins and his teeth are perfectly aligned. Maura can't help but think it would piss Jane off to see him smile. He's truly unaware of his good looks because he looks at her nervously. "What's it like to be the chief Medical Examiner?" he fingers the cloth on their table.

Maura's smile is hesitant and her eyes give a vague look past him through the intimately lit restaurant to the Charles river. "It's an interesting job. I'm quite glad I decided to work in Boston."

"Was it not your original choice?" he asks with a look of actual interest. It's something, she notices almost sadly, Jane never gave her.

"No," she shakes her head no and looks at him finally. Her smile grows bigger because he's here and he's listening. He's not upset with her at all and that makes her happy. He recipocrates her smile with one of his own that obviously states he's been reassured of her interest in him. "I worked in Jamaica Plain before I was promoted to Chief. Before that, I was offered positions from San Diego, Seattle, and Portland in Maine."

"Once news spread that Massachusetts wanted me as their Chief, I was given offers from D.C., New York, and Florida."

"D.C., huh?" he asks with a vague sense of intimidation. "Why'd you turn them down?"

Maura looks thoughtful. "I'm not sure. I certainly believe I am far more qualified for Washington D.C., I suppose I just stayed here because I thought of it as home."

"Thought?"

"I still do." She assures only half committally.

"Good." He drops his head, sheepishly. "Actually, I'm kind of glad you're still here. I may be stuck sitting across from an old man white hair and dentures."

Maura laughs softly. "I suppose I'm doing you a great justice?"

"I suppose you are."

They slip into a leisure discussion.

* * *

Jane's run out of beer and Jo Friday is asleep in her lap. The game is almost over and her guests are nearly half asleep.

She sighs annoyed. That's it, she decides. She's getting those freeloading, beer-finishing, hamburger-inhaling assholes out of her apartment.

She moves her legs and Jo jumps to the floor. The small dog curls up next to the recliner and falls back asleep easily, so easily Jane is almost envious.

"Hey!" she claps her hands thunderously.

All three men jolt awake then look at her tiredly.

"Time to get up and go home." She grabs Frankie's hand and pulls him to his feet. He leans against her.

"Five more minutes," he mumbles on her shoulder.

"No way," she shoves him off and he stumbles to land on Vince and Frost. "Oh jeez," she sighs when her partners protest loudly. "You guys are pathetic."

"Take it easy," Frankie stands. "We're not the ones you're mad at."'

"Oh really?" she gives him a questioning look that implies they very much are. "You assholes ate my food and finished my beer. I'm pretty pissed at you."

"What are you gonna do, let us drive home drunk?" Frost yawns but stands, barely.

"Guess that wouldn't be in my best interest as a cop, now would it?" Jane closes her eyes trying obtain as much patience as possible.

A beat passes, then: "Fine, let's go. I'll drop you all off and you can come get your cars in the morning."

"But, Janie I rode here with you." Frankie says.

"Then I guess you won't have a reason to come back tomorrow." She pushes him out the door.

Korsak is the last one out.

In the hall, while she locks her door, the three men stand tiredly but more alert now than they were a minute ago. "You know, tomorrow is gonna be hell." Frost says to Korsak.

"Tell me about it." Frankie rubs his eyes. "Janie's gonna be hungover, Maura's gonna be happy-"

"Why is she gonna be happy?" Frost asks in an innocently confused voice.

"She had a date tonight."

Frost and Korsak let out a long, "oooooooh," as they finally understand what's got Jane's panties wound so tight. "That explains a helluva lot." Frost continues.

"Let's go." She ushers them to the elevator.

They walk with a deliberately slow pace. "Wonder if it was that Pediatrician we brought in for questioning last week. You know, they really hit off. He had her laughing in the cafe for fifteen minutes." Korsak informs casually.

"Nah," Frost shakes his head. "I bet it was that lawyer from court on Monday."

Frankie and Korsak share a look of "yeah probably" until Jane scorns them.

They drop their gazes but Frost doesn't see. "If it's not him, it's probably the Assistant D.A."

"James Corvall?" Jane scoffs. "That man wouldn't know what to do with Maura."

"And you would?" Frost shoots back.

Jane hesitates for a beat. "Well I'm not a dyke if that's what you're getting at but yes. If I were a man I probably would know how to treat a woman. Way better than Corvall the assface."

Frankie chuckles quietly next to Korsak.

"What's so funny?"

He shakes his head and wipes his smile away. "Nothing, Janie. Jesus, nothing."

"Speak up, you got something to say then say it."

"You're so goddamn clueless, that's all."

She clenches her jaw and counts to ten, then twenty, then thirty. She really fucking hates Frankie sometimes.

* * *

James' coat is draped over Maura's shoulders as they walk. The street is loud with loud footsteps of other pedestrians and cars honking. Around them are inviting neon signs and beautiful buildings.

"I really like being with you." James's hands are stuffed into his pockets. He steps evenly with her and even bumps his shoulder playfully into hers.

Maura smiles. "Me too."

He grins and sighs happily. "So, is there a chance we can do this again next Friday?"

She thinks about Jane for a moment. The fact that Jane told her she'd be busy doesn't even cross her mind nor does it encourage her to decline him. But she does it anyway. "I...have a confession."

They both stop walking when they come to a bench small enough to only fit them. He gestures for her to sit.

Maura does. "I don't think I'm entirely ready to begin dating. I...I can do casual."

"Casual?" he lifts an eyebrow.

She nods.

James rubs his hands together. "I can do casual too. I really like you, Maura. I hope that doesn't change anything. Though I won't lie if this does ever turn serious, I wouldn't really complain. You're a beautiful woman, obviously." He gestures and they both laugh a little. "Really established and smart, did I mention beautiful?"

She smiles.

"But we can take this slow, if you'd like."

She nods in appreciation.

"May I ask why? Did you just get out of a relationship or something?"

Maura thinks. She hasn't been in anything more than a one-night-stand with dinner and sex since Dennis. Which was nearly a year ago.

"Not recently, but I'm still not ready for anything long term." She frowns.

"I understand." And he sincerely does.

They watch as the city moves before them. It's quiet between them and she doesn't mind it. She even scoots closer to him to soak in his warmth. She feels comfortable. But she doesn't feel much more than that. She doesn't feel what she feels when she's next to Jane and that was the whole point of dating James.

He's Italian. He's tall. He's sleek and lean and muscular. He's almost perfect to her.

But he isn't Jane.

* * *

**A/N:** Everybody leave a review on your way out. They're like gift baskets...for the author.


	2. Chapter 2

Jane receives a call from Operations as she's asleep. She fumbles for her phone before violently pressing on the screen.

"Rizzoli." which is just shy of an impatient "what?"

"There's a victim at the Tenean Beach. Detective Frost and Sergeant Korsak have already arrived on scene."

"Yeah, okay." She hangs up. She takes a moment before restlessly pulling herself out of bed. Jane stumbles to her bathroom, but she doesn't have time for a shower so she brushes her teeth as quickly as possible and skips out on coffee.

She's not even properly dressed before she's out of her apartment.

When she arrives on scene, her hair is still tangled — which she brushes just before she gets out of her cruiser — and she sees that even Frost looks a little worse for the wear.

She's tucking her shirt in when her partner comes to greet her with a coffee and information on his iPad. "No ID, yet." He states.

Jane takes the coffee and gives him a grateful look. "We got a cause of death then?"

He shakes his head no and follows her. "But, Maura found a tattoo behind the victim's left ear. It looks like it could be a gang tat. Frankie's running recognition."

Her mouth twitches at the mention of her brother. She's still a little pissed at him but she doesn't dwell on it. "What about time of death?"

Frost shakes his head again. "No, but-"

"Forget it, I'll talk to Maur about it."

When she reaches the beach, there's a crowd of officers surrounding Maura around the body. She fights her way through to find Maura crouched down in a black pencil skirt. She stops short when she sees her best friend has on red gumboots to match her red blouse.

Maura glances up at Jane tiredly but smiles immediately. "I thought you'd never show."

Jane grunts in acknowledgment. "Believe me I thought about not coming." She crouches down across from Maura and looks down at a young victim. He looks as old as Korsak's son. Even looks like a skateboarder too.

"Got anything useful?"

"I think we have two very different definitions of that word," Maura contemplates aloud. "I find all forensic information useful."

"Yeah well learning the last time he had a bowel movement wouldn't be useful, now would it?"

Maura smirks. "You never know."

Jane rolls her eyes. "So what do you have?"

"Well," the Medical Examiner adjusts her position so that she's leaning over the body and quite frankly way too close to Jane's face — she sniffs and smells that Maura used a new shampoo, it smells like vanilla and lavender — she points to a head wound just above the victim's left ear that's covered by matted hair. "I almost missed it."

"Was it our cause of death?"

"I'm not sure."

"If you had to guess," Jane says with exaggerated mock patience. "Would you say that it is?"

"I don't guess."

The Detective scrubs her face roughly and lets out a groan.

"Are you feeling okay?" Maura asks. She moves back to her side of the body. Jane misses the close proximity immediately. "You seem a little more impatient than usual."

"Well," Jane gestures dramatically to the body. "We've got a dead teenage kid on our hands. I've got about five other freaking cases going cold and Cavanaugh is up my ass about helping out other units. I got a full plate, so unfortunately I don't have time for thorough. I need something to go off so I can close this case and get back to my life."

Maura looks at her thoughtfully. Then her demeanor drops precipitously. "I'm sorry, Detective. I can have someone else assigned to the case."

Jane's confused.

The officers around them suddenly find the sand so freaking interesting.

Jane sighs. "No, that's-no Maur I'm not...I'm just tired, alright? I'm being a bitch. I think I'm getting my period or something or maybe Korsak was right about my estrogen."

Maura only looks intriguingly confused but doesn't say anything.

"I'm sorry. Don't mind me. Once I've had enough coffee and some food in me I'll be back to my regular self."

"But you haven't."

"What?"

"You haven't been back to your regular self." Maura looks at her. Her green eyes pierce her with a heartbroken sincerity that hurts Jane to her core because they're finally broaching the subject of all their arguments recently. Jane isn't ready for it. "You've been very distant lately and I don't understand why. I try to be there for you and you call me clingy. I try to give you distance and you yell at me. I don't understand what to do, Jane."

"I know." She gives a small smile. "You're great that way. Always trying to figure me out to help me. Look, I don't get what's going on either, Maur. But I think that's something we can talk about later. Not here, not now. Okay?"

Maura smiles, despite feeling a little rejected. "Okay."

There's a pregnant pause, then Maura stands. "There's not much more I can figure out here. I'll need to finish this in my autopsy."

"Okay." Jane stays crouched down. She wants to say something only so she feels like their relationship isn't ruined or anything. But, Maura looks like she's about to cry and she doesn't want to risk becoming the asshole at the precinct that made sweet ol' Dr. Isles cry. "See you back at BPD?"

Maura only nods but then walks off, with the escort of an officer, back to her car.

"Wow," Frost whistles loudly as he reappears next to her faithfully like a German shepherd. "That was painful."

"Don't say shit about it, Frost." She rolls her eyes and stands, with much protests from her bones.

* * *

Jane brisks into the already busy cafe with Frost. She sees her brother and Ma having a quiet but heated discussion behind the counter.

"Can I get some damn service!" A cop slams his hand down repeatedly over the bell.

"Hey, buddy calm it down, alright?" Jane warns. "You'll get your damn jelly donut soon enough."

"Janie," Tommy comes from around the counter to meet her. "I'm so glad you're here. Listen, I got a painting job I need to do in thirty minutes. Think you can watch TJ for a bit?"

Her eyes go wide. "What the hell? Do you see this place swarming with cops, Tommy? It's a busy goddamn day, I ain't got time for babysitting."

"Please, Janie I can't miss this job. It'll look bad on my record."

"And what? Multiple burglaries and running over a priest won't?"

He rolls his eyes. "Janie, c'mon. I know there's a daycare here. Just get TJ in it. I really need this job. They're offering to pay enough to cover my child support for the next three months."

She takes TJ from him. "And what exactly are you painting?"

"A house." He shrugs like it's obvious.

"Oh and does this house belong to the mob?"

"No. It's just a big house. Don't worry about it. Thanks, though." He pats her shoulder and leaves before she can protest.

She looks at Frost.

"Go, go. I'll get us some coffee. Meet you in Brig?"

"Thanks, Frost." She sends him an appreciative look then reminds herself to get him a good present for his birthday.

* * *

Maura's weighing the victim's heart when Jane and Frost walk in. He's eating a donut that he no longer thinks he wants. He looks between the maple bar and the body on the slab and tries to decide if he should throw it away or get the hell out of there.

Maura glances over her shoulder at their entrance. "I was just about to call you." She says matter-of-factly. "I found something interesting."

"Great," Jane waits by the slab. "What'd you find?"

"Your victim was born a woman."

"What?!"

Maura nods and turns, carrying the heart with her, back to the slab. "I noticed it before but I didn't want to assume."

"Don't you freaking think that was something to tell me? We could have identified her a lot sooner."

"Him."

"What?"

"The victim is a man."

"But you just said-"

"I know what I just said." She leans over the body, giving Jane a stern look. "This is a man. He went through a lot of medical, surgical, and psychological procedures to be considered a man. He is a man."

"Jeez, I didn't mean to offend you, Maur."

"You didn't. However, if our victim were alive today he would be greatly offended."

"Well he's dead." She exaggerates. "And you neglected to tell me-"

Maura reels back, a little miffed "I neglected?"

"Yes you neglected."

"I had a hunch. I couldn't be sure and I wasn't going to very well stick my hands down his pants in public to be sure. Besides, when news like this is given out cops begin to treat this as a hate crime. I trusted that you would treat this young man as you would any other victim. And look for his killer not by his life decisions but by forensic evidence."

"But we may be looking at a hate crime."

"Or we may not be."

"You are ridiculous, you know that, right?"

Frost coughs. "I think-I'll just go see what Korsak's got. Give him the news." He turns on his heel, but only gets as far as a foot away from the bickering women before they stop him.

"No," both women say.

"I would like you to be here, Frost. You are every bit of a Detective as Jane."

Jane scowls. "Go." She barks.

He looks a little offended but leaves anyway. Glad he doesn't have to hear mommy and mommy argue, and glad he gets to keep his donut. He bites into it on his way out.

Jane folds her arms across her chest. Maura mimics the action with a glare. "I can't believe you."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"You withheld vital information, Maura."

"Why does it matter that he was born a woman?"

"Because there aren't many freaking transgender teenagers in Boston. It would have limited our search."

"I wasn't even sure." She drops her hands, as well as her scowl to Jane. Because she knows Jane is right, but she feels like she's being accused of obstructing justice. She truly couldn't be sure. "I wanted to make sure. Here."

Jane drops her arms with a defeated sigh. "What the hell is going on with us?"

Maura looks at the young victim's face. "I don't know."

"Okay, so our victim was born a woman. There's not a lot of doctors in Boston that perform those kind of procedures. We can start looking there."

Maura doesn't know what to say. She finds it hard to keep up with Jane's thought process.

"I'll go see what Frost can dig up. You got an age?"

"I'm only estimating here but between sixteen and nineteen."

"Okay." She waits a beat. "You wanna get dinner later?"

Maura looks at her with an obviously confused look. She tilts her head slightly and blinks. "Dinner?"

"Yeah?" Jane grins. "I'll be hungry, you'll probably be hungry. We can get take-out and head back to your place or something. And we can...talk. If you want." She shrugs.

"I'd like that." Maura beams.

It puts Jane's smile to shame. "Great, I'll call you when I go home."

"Don't bother. I'll bring dinner to your apartment." She continues off Jane's confused look. "Your mother is having a sleepover with Cavanaugh."

The brunette gives a grateful smile. "Shit, thanks. I really don't wanna hear that. Great, I'll text you." She leaves hurriedly before they start an argument over who pays for the take-out.

* * *

** A/N**: The pace might be weird like the fact that you guys haven't experienced the recent arguments but really they're not important. What's important is that as of right now Jane and Maura are going through a rough patch in their friendship and they don't know why.

As always, your reviews and messages on tumblr are all the encouragement I need. Also if you like the story or my other stories, tell your friends about it.


	3. Chapter 3

Frost is spinning mindlessly in his chair.

"Boy you sure look bored for someone who has a lot of murders to solve."

He rolls his eyes. "I'm waiting for lab to call me about prints." But he stops spinning anyways. "You okay?" he nods to the elevators, indicating the morgue.

She nods. "Yeah-yeah we're fine." Jane scoots her chair closer to her desk. She wiggles the mouse and waits for the machine to moan to life.

His eyebrows hitch. "Really?"

Off his "I don't buy that for a minute" look she rolls her eyes. "Alright we're obviously going through a rough patch."

Frost lets out a laugh as he leans back into his seat. He tosses a pen in the air then catches it easily. "You know who goes through rough patches?"

"Nah, but I think you're gonna tell me."

"Married couples."

She only sighs.

"My Ma and Pop went through a rough patch too. Now he's married to the Navy and she's marrying a woman."

"You sayin' I'm gonna marry my job and Maur's gonna marry a woman?"

He looks at her curiously. "I'm saying there's obviously some reason you two are bickering like an old married couple that shoulda divorced years ago."

"Enlighten me almighty all knowing." She rests her chin on her fists and gives him her full attention.

He purses his lips. "Well, I noticed the way you got defensive last night."

"You called me a dyke."

He flinches, out of respect for his mom. "I never said that word. And you only use it when you think it applies to you. Which I guess I figure, cause it applies to butch lesbians and you are one-"

"Finish that sentence, please I dare you."

"Well anyway, you get all protective every time a man shows any interest in Maura."

"Well can you blame me? The woman's dated two murderers and Giovanni." She laughs suddenly, realizing what he's getting at. "You're trying to tell me I have a thing for Maura, aren't you?"

He shrugs. "It's not really impossible, Jane. You two still have sleepovers."

"Sometimes I get too drunk and crash at her house." She dismisses. But continues after a beat. "It keeps me from wrapping my cruiser around a tree and saves me cab fare."

"Okay, I'll buy that. But what's her excuse? I can't imagine the great Doctor Isles getting drunk. Buzzed? Maybe. But not drunk."

"You'd be surprised how many glasses of wine can influence Maura the lightweight."

He rolls his eyes. "Denial."

"It's not denial if you're wrong."

"Am I, though? Am I really?"

"Yes." She says, terminating the conversation in one syllable. Frost turns his attention back to his monitor and Jane mumbles something about working with idiots. He smirks because he knows he's just planted a seed.

* * *

When Jane unlocks her apartment door, she's thinking about texting Maura to cancel their dinner plans. She's tired and she hasn't been able to stop thinking about Frost's implications earlier. She doesn't have feelings for Maura.

But she doesn't know how the hell to describe what she does feel for Maura. It sure as hell isn't something she feels for all her other friends.

Her apartment is still messy from neglecting to clean it all week and somehow she feels naked, bare, like each and every insecurity of hers is on display yet she doesn't understand what that has to do with her apartment.

Something just doesn't feel right within her.

She quickly drafts a text to her best friend and sends it before hurrying to the shower. Jane is in her black bra and dark blue boyshorts, vacuuming the living room. Jo Friday lifts her head from the armrest on the couch and Jane notices the movement from her peripheral. There's a knock on the door then after a beat Maura uses the key.

She walks in on a half naked Jane and an excited Jo.

Jo Friday barks her greeting but Maura is carrying a large brown paper bag in one hand and holding her purse with the other.

"I didn't mean to intrude," Maura only half-heartedly apologizes.

Jane waves her off. "You've seen me in much less."

There's a nervous laugh shared between them.

Maura turns her attention to the bag. "I got us Italian."

Jane's stomach thunders loudly and she feels a little embarrassed. "Sounds good. Listen, I'll go get dressed. You can-" she gestures to the couch. "Make yourself comfortable."

Maura stays in the kitchen instead. She pulls up a stool to the counter. She waits patiently, casually going through her text messages and emails, she even chews lightly on a roll.

"Sorry 'bout that," Jane re-emerges from her bedroom. "I kind of got lost in cleaning."

"You clean when you're nervous." Maura states like it's another fact from a textbook.

Jane blushes a little. But doesn't say anything. Instead, she digs into the containers.

"Do I make you nervous, Jane?"

She pulls up a stool next to Maura. "No," it's not entirely a lie but...it's not entirely the truth either. She doesn't look at her friend. "I mean, I don't know. No. No I don't think you do but maybe you do and I don't know it."

Maura doesn't press.

Off her friend's silence, Jane continues. "You got any scientific explanation for why I don't know that?"

The Medical Examiner shakes her head, quietly. She nibbles on the roll in her hands.

There's a beat of silence then Jo Friday barks.

"Why is this awkward?" Jane asks.

Maura shrugs. "I'm not entirely sure. I've learned to stop applying science to our friendship. Theoretically speaking, we shouldn't even be friends. Let alone like one another."

The Detective laughs. "Yeah, but I guess I didn't really like you when I first met you anyway."

"I liked you." Maura's voice hitches. Her mouth twitches and her eyes fall.

Jane gets up and gets two plates for them. "Yeah but that's because you like everyone. Never got a bad thing to say about anyone."

"I'm not very fond of Dr. Pike,"

"But you didn't hate him at first. You got to know the guy and realized he was a colossal asshole."

"Your mother always intimidated me." She shrugs. "I didn't not like her, but I was afraid of her."

Jane grins at the possibility her housewife mother intimidated Dr. Isles. "Really?"

Maura nods.

"You want some wine?"

"You have wine?"

Jane looks sheepish. "I uh, yeah, I do. I figured the next time you came over I could have some for you like you have beer for me." She rounds the corner of the counter back into the kitchen. She digs into the refrigerator and pulls out a bottle of cheap wine. "It's nothing fancy. But Ma likes it."

Despite it not being her of her usual tastes, Maura accepts the wine with a touched look. "Thank you,"

"No problem." Jane goes back to retrieve her own beer. "You know, I was actually reading up on where to store good wine if I ever got it. You got a wine cellar, right?"

"I do," Maura nods, pouring the white wine into a glass Jane retrieved for her. "It's in the basement, actually."

"I figured,"

"Why?"

"You just seemed the type to be prepared for that stuff." She shrugs. "It's actually one of the things I like about you."

"And there are things you don't like about me?" the honey-blonde asks in a teasing tone.

"Oh, yeah. But I- _we'd_ have to be a lot more drunk to go into that territory. There's no way I'm letting you hold any of that over my head."

"Well, now I'm scared."

Jane smirks.


	4. Chapter 4

3/4ths a bottle and four beers later, Maura has removed her heels and joined Jane on the couch. The Discovery Channel is providing light in the living room as the two women face each other.

Jane left leg is tucked beneath her.

Maura's are crossed.

Jane puts her phone back on the coffee table and rubs her eyes drunkenly. "I didn't realize it was so late."

Maura laughs drunkenly. It's interrupted by a hiccup that brings a smile to Jane's face. A drunk Maura has always been one of her favorites to observe. The way her friend's movements are circumstantially slow and how her eyes are drooped closed but she stays awake.

"What time is it?" Maura runs a hand through her honey-blonde hair.

"Midnight." Jane rolls her neck until it cracks. She groans. "Gotta be at BPD in seven hours." She groans again and more deeply at the realization and presses a pillow to her face.

"May I ask you something, Jane?"

There's a beat. She thinks for a moment her best friend fell asleep.

"Sure," comes the muffled, thick reply. "Shoot."

Maura hesitates, sure that she's only worked up the courage because of the wine in her blood. She adjusts in her spot and it's enough for Jane to remove the pillow. She looks at the M.E. with encouraging brown eyes.

"Why do I feel so comfortable with you?"

Jane doesn't understand. Her brows come together in a tight knit and she sits up. "Whaddya mean?" Her words a little lazy.

"I don't know." Maura shrugs. "I just feel very comfortable with you. At dinner last night, I was very nervous. I was unsure of what to say. I've always been that way but it never truly stopped me from dating but then I met you and," she shrugs exaggeratedly. "I just don't feel nervous."

"Not even a little?"

"Nope."

"Not even at first?"

Maura smiles. "Nope."

"Huh,"

"Indeed."

"I felt nervous around you."

"Really?"

"Mhm," Jane sits up like they're about to start talking about cute boys. "I practiced almost every conversation we had in my head and when you didn't follow the script I had planned, I freaked. It's why I was kind of mean at first."

"Kind of?" Maura laughs. "You were a nightmare. I constantly felt unsure of my friendship with you. You belittled my entire approach to forensics and I somehow still wanted to be your friend."

"Yeah," Jane says regrettably. "I'm sorry about that. I respected you a lot. Still do. I dunno, I'm just a bitch I guess. I'm glad you stuck with me."

"Me too."

"So tell me about this date," she leans forward and touches her friend's thigh. It's soft and warm. Her hand lingers, and both women stare at it with vaguely aroused looks, then she pulls it back into her lap.

"James?" she emits an unimpressive grunt. "He was very sweet and kind. He seemed interested in everything about me."

"But?" Jane asks, almost hopeful.

Maura almost says, "he's not you." Instead she licks her lips. "No buts. We decided we'd play for casual."

The brunette snorts. "Casual being cheap dinners and sex?"

"I'll have you know, sex with me is at least an expensive dinner."

Jane laughs, then Maura does too. "Hell if that's all it takes to get you into bed then I'll take you to Red Lobster now."

"Luckily, you wouldn't have to go through so much trouble."

"Ah," Jane smirks. "So for me you're easy?"

"Not easy," she slaps Jane's arm. "I would like at least some effort."

"How about I start using coasters at your place, that enough effort?" Jane scoots in closer.

Maura thinks for a moment then decides that's not enough.

"How about I start buying the whole wheat bread instead?" She's leaning towards Maura now.

"I suppose changing your dietary habits which in hindsight would save your life is a big enough effort."

Their lips are a centimeter apart. She can feel Maura's warm breath on her lips. She can smell, and even taste, the wine on her friend's breath. She nods and whispers almost as seductively as her drunk mind can manage. "I'll pick some up at the store tomorrow."

It's Maura that finishes the distance.

She presses her lips to Jane's and at first they stay like that. Their lips unmoving and it's a little awkward, until Jane's jaw moves involuntarily. The kiss deepens to something more fierce, something neither women could explain.

The room became hot, quiet, and dark.

Jane leans forward, gently pushing Maura into a laying position. She was atop her best friend, kissing her, hands roaming her friend's flush skin. It felt entirely unfamiliar and yet unmistakably arousing and comfortable.

She thinks it should feel awkward. It shouldn't feel right. Maura's her best friend. Maura's out of her league. Maura's a geek. Maura's a freaking woman. But it's Maura. And Maura feels good beneath her. Maura feels warm and inviting. Maura feels like home. She feels light and she tastes sweet. She smells divine. She sounds heavenly.

Maura hears her name coming from Jane's lips, like a desperate whisper. It's begging and urging but she doesn't know what to do. She wants to give Jane whatever she's asking for but she doesn't understand.

So she presses her fingers to her best friend's sides, and Jane sighs in relief. Maura slides her hands up and Jane's plaid shirt lifts with it. She can feel the brunette's warm skin, her exposed abdomen, taut and muscular. Her fingers graze the brim of Jane's jeans.

"Shit," Jane groans, pushing herself into Maura's core.

It brings forth a moan of her own. It's a deep guttural weightless groan of pleasure she didn't think Jane would ever witness.

"You feel so good," Jane whispers, her lips now on Maura's neck. And the honey-blonde tilting her head to give her friend easier access.

Their hands are fumbling and knocking awkwardly into each other. Jane wants Maura's skirt off. Maura wants Jane's shirt off.

It's not until Jane becomes increasingly frustrated that she can't just yank the damn skirt down does she realize what she's doing. She's making out with her best friend on her couch in the dark. Her very female best friend. She wouldn't even know what to do if she got the skirt off.

She pulls away from Maura and a big, loud, wet sucking noise is the last sound that is heard before there's utter distance between both women.

Only the muted television and their heavy breathing is between them.

Maura swallows hard and keeps her eyes averted to the ceiling.

Jane looks down at Maura's hiked up skirt. "Shit," she stands quickly. "Shit, shit, shit." She fixes her shirt. "I'm sorry,"

But Maura doesn't know if she's apologizing for the kiss or the string of crass language. She swallows again and sits up.

"I'm...I..." Jane's first instinct is to run but she's annoyingly aware that she's in her own apartment. "I-"

"I'll go." Maura stands, briskly. Like the kiss didn't happen.

"You can't." Jane stops her. But she doesn't know why. "You had a lot to drink." She swallows visibly.

Maura opens her mouth but then shuts it.

"Sleep here." Off Maura's widened eyes, she continues after an insecure laugh. "In the guest room."

Maura looks a little relieved. "Okay," she says as though there's three syllables in the word. "I'll sleep in the guest room."

"Okay." Jane drops her arm. "I- goodnight?"

"Goodnight, Jane." Maura looks tired. As though she's already suffering the hangover. The two women part down the hall, but stay firmly pressed against the door.

When there's no movement in the hall after a moment they both deflate. Utterly confused about what just transpired between them.

* * *

**A/N**: want more? review, man.


End file.
